1st trimester

The hardest thing about keeping our little secret was not blogging about it.  There were moments and memories that I naturally wanted to record for memory's sake, but then couldn't because, well, it was a secret.

But, now that everybody knows about the new little one, I can go back and recap some of the past 13 weeks and answer some of the questions I've been getting from here and there.

So, let's see, where to start?  The beginning?

Unlike with Abby, this pregnancy was planned and expected.  It was a very different experience than the pure shock (disbelief, denial, despair, ha!) that accompanied our finding out last time.  This time, there was a lot of waiting and anticipation.  Waiting to test and waiting to test and waiting to test.  I had 4 negative pregnancy tests and had given up for that month until I tried that last one - and lo and behold, it was positive.

Because we had seen so many negatives and I didn't have any symptoms, it was a little unreal for a while.  Not in the same way that Abby was unreal - but just that we had convinced ourselves that I wasn't pregnant and so learning that I was took a little bit to sink in.  Not to mention, I was busy with Abby - and I think it's normal not to think about the 2nd pregnancy as much as you did the first because you have so much more going on.  I kept forgetting that I was pregnant.

...but I was ;)

I had few to no symptoms for weeks. My chest may have been a little sore, but nothing overly noticeable.  I didn't have any cravings, no aversions, no morning sickness, no crazy fatigue - I felt disturbingly normal.  This was one of the reasons I agreed to wait until the 12 week mark to tell this time, I really wasn't 100% confident that the pregnancy would last.  I just didn't feel pregnant -  at all.

Little by little, the fatigue increased a bit - but still nowhere what I felt with Abby.  I started to notice that I would feel queasy if I didn't eat frequently enough - but no morning sickness.  I started to develop food preferences, but not really cravings.  I completely lost my sweet tooth for a while.  Sweets did not repulse me - I'd eat ice cream if I had to - but it did not sound good.  I did not want sweets.  Kyle would ask if I wanted to make brownies and I'd say, "eh, if you want"  But, for what I lacked in a sweet tooth, I made up for in salt.  Now, if you know me, you know that I like salt - I'm not proud of that, but it's just the way things are. So, for me to want salt more than usual is....notable.

There are only two instances so far of extreme food cravings/aversions.  The first one is sushi.  Even typing the word makes me gag a little.  One day, we were at whole foods and decided to pick up something for lunch.  I decided some California rolls sounded really good.  When we got home, I ate one or two and couldn't finish them.  And then, I couldn't smell them.  And then, I couldn't look at them.  And then, I couldn't even think about them without that gag reflex setting in.  This is sad, because normally, I really enjoy sushi.  But, for now, no can do.  And that's all I'm going to write about that because it's upsetting my stomach.

The only crazy craving I've had was for sour candy.  Kyle and I were driving out to wal-mart to pick up a few things and on the way I said, "doesn't sour candy sound good?" Kyle said, "um, sure..."  From that point on, it's ALL I could think about.  We did our shopping, and I was scanning shelves for sour candy.  I eventually found the candy aisle and grabbed several boxes of sour patch kids candy.  Then, a little voice of reason broke through and I put them all back and only took 1 box.  As soon as the cashier had scanned it, I said "I'll take that" and I started to open it before we had even finished paying.  By the time we got to the car, I'd eaten 1/2 the box.  And my mind could only think one loud and repeating thought "I CANNOT GET THESE IN MY MOUTH FAST ENOUGH!"  I finished the whole box in a matter of a few minutes.  At one point I asked Kyle if he wanted one, he looked frightened and said, "umm, no that's ok, you, uh, you go ahead"   It was almost as if I wasn't even in control - like I HAD to eat those candies RIGHT then or I would explode.

But, that was the only time that's happened.  I had a terrible stomachache the rest of that day, ha.

We had our first doctor's appointment when I was 9 weeks.  It was too early to hear the heartbeat - which didn't exactly encourage my theory that all was going to be happy and healthy, so we decided to continue to wait to tell until we got confirmation that everything was ok.  On a happier note, I was officially at the same weight I was when I started my pregnancy with Abby.  The nurse asked me how old I was and I thought about it and said, "um, 26?" I really couldn't figure it out right then.  It didn't dawn on me until I'd left that I told her the wrong age.  So, when I went back at 12 weeks I told her that I said the wrong age.  "I'm actually 27, and I'm gonna be 28 next month"  She had a good laugh about that and told me I was too young to be lying about my age.  ;o)

Around 7/8 weeks?, school started back and with my increased activity I noticed I was a little more tired in the evenings.  It's taken some adjusting to get used to balancing work and home, wife and mama, down time with errands and chores.  In fact, I'm nowhere near figuring it out.  But, I do have my priorities and, like my friend Jen wrote the other day - I'd much rather spend my time playing on the floor than sweeping it.  Once I started back to work - I started cooking less, much less.  It was one of those things that got sacrificed in the name of exhaustion and time. But, that has to change.  And, I'm making it a higher priority now that I'm getting into a better work groove and my tiredness is letting up a little.

I gave up caffine completely for the first 10 weeks or so of this pregnancy, but work eventually convinced me to give in a little.  I now usually have a cup of coffee a day - the doc said that's more than fine, and that's a good thing, because MAN does it help!

Our 12 weeks appointment was nice.  We spent a long time with the ultrasound tech and it was neat to see the little one in there - so human like.  He/She was hiccuping and waving and punching and swallowing.  We watched as it put it's hands on it's face, and back down, and back up - it's *really* amazing what you can see.  It was at that point, that things started to become real.  For all of us.

Abby is too young still to understand what's going on.  And I'm ok with that.  I've asked her if she'd like a new baby, and she politely answers, "no"  So, I figure we'll be revisiting that in the future. ;)  My dad reminded me of when my grandmother asked him and his brothers if they'd like a new baby brother or sister.  They took a vote and told her "no"  Funny story :)  I imagine as I start to show, it will be easier to "explain" things to her.  And although it's months away, and I know the transitioning will not be easy, I am ever so optimistic that Abby is going to be an amazing big sister.  You know, we knew when she was born that she was not only the "first" but also the "oldest"  I told Kyle when Abs was just a few weeks old "Isn't it weird to think that she's the oldest child too?"  We've always known we wanted more kids and I'm (at this point anyway ;) excited to see that happen.

So, now we're entering the start of the second trimester and I'm feeling pretty good about things.  I take my vitamins (most days), I'm not showing at all and still have not gained any weight - but unlike the first time around, I am in NO hurry for that to happen.  I'll keep wearing pants that button and zip for as long as I can get away with it.

Thanks for all the well wishes - things are quite good around here. :)