Saturday, May 28, 2011

thursday

I just want to quickly document our Thursday before it gets too far in the rear view mirror.  Thursday was Abby giving her best performance at being two.  Really, this kid is pretty good most of the time.  We've certainly had more attention seeking behaviors since Elizabeth came along, but even those are typically tame.  But.  Thursday.  Ugh. 

We had three meltdowns within the first hour of our day.  The first one was over getting dressed, the second was over brushing her hair, and the third one was over breakfast.  Here's how the third one went down:

I go to the kitchen to pour Abby a cup of milk and toast her an english muffin for breakfast.  Abby sees me pouring the milk and screams, "NOOOOO I don't want to eat breakfast right now!"  To which, I reply, "Ok." I just calmly put her food down on a blanket for her should she decide she wants it.  And, apparently, that was the wrong thing to do.  She spent the next 15 minutes screaming and crying at the top of her lungs into the carpet.

exhibit A


I ignored her, of course.  And, after that 15 minutes, she stopped.  She then continued to just lay there in silence (fine by me)  As soon as she heard Kyle coming down the stairs, she started up with her crying.  He ignores her and pretty soon we were on with our day.

I took the girls to Target to get a few things (and to browse at several more things).  Really, Abby wasn't bad for most of the trip.  But...she eventually started in on this thing that drives me bonkers.  She just screams.  At the top of her lungs.  Now, at home?  At home, I can ignore this until she loses her voice completely, but when we're out and about - It's harder to do that.  So, after several warnings - she got a time out at Target.

exhibit B

That was one of two she had while in the store.  One good thing about Abby and being difficult is that she does not fight a timeout.  I suppose it has just not dawned on her yet that she could refuse to stand there.  And, I actually think that she likes the time outs.  Which is bittersweet because I want her to feel punished - and yet - I've often had to go to time out for bad behavior because I needed the break too, and I'm always so glad that she goes so willingly.

And, she always tells me why she got a time out, we discuss what she could have done differently, and we hug.  And, she's good after that.  I mean, she's good for a little while anyway. ;)

After Target, we stopped in Carter's where Abby hung her head and said "I'm so sad!"  When I asked her why she was sad, she said "I just want monies in my hand, mommy.  I don't have any monies"  It was confusing and amusing all at once.

After Carter's, we went to pick up Kyle for a quick family lunch.  On the way - this happened:



Both girls were asleep in the car.  Abby never falls asleep in the car under normal circumstances.  Only if it's past her naptime or if she's sick....but this was 11am.   So, this is where I interject my spiel on sleep.

Some of Abby's behaviors are due to good old fashioned attention seeking.  Those are pretty easy to recognize.  But, a lot of them are due to her sleep...or lack thereof.  And, it's largely our fault.  As the days have gotten longer, and with Elizabeth in the mix, Abby has been going to bed later.  Typically, around 8. Sometimes 8:30.  The problem with this (besides being an hour past her normal bedtime anyway) is that she also likes to talk and sing to herself for a while, so she's not going to bed until 9ish.  This is not good.  This causes her to wake up earlier.  She wakes up with the sun: 5:45am.

So.  In sum.  She's not getting enough sleep.  Which means, on days like Thursday?  She wakes up tired and we have 3 meltdowns in an hour (remember exhibit A?)

So, I've renewed my efforts to get her to bed and nap on time.  After 2 days of early nap and bedtimes?  Abby slept till 7am this morning and took an extra long nap.  So, we're on the right track I think.

ANYWAY.  Back to our day...on Thursday.

We met Kyle for lunch and food always makes her happy - here's my sweetie being sweet.

We came home and I put E to nap.  Then, I went to put Abby down for nap.  I'm not going to rehash every second of that afternoon, but in short - she didn't nap, and after 2 hours of trying and trying and trying to get her to sleep - I gave up.

But.  Since Abby wasted 2 hours of my afternoon, I decided she had to pay it back.  So, for the next 2 hours, she sat on a chair and watched me work and do chores.  We did not talk.  She did not play.  She sat in the chair.  When she tried to get out - I would look at her and she would sit back down.  If she started talking - I ignored her or gave her a quick "shh"  And, after those 2 hours were up, I decided to give her some quiet play time.

We kept the afternoon low key.  She had a few more tantrums (surprise surprise), but wasn't *too* bad.  Because she didn't take any nap, I made SURE she was in bed on time.

exhibit C

It was a long day for sure.  And I thought several times that I would do anything for my toddler to act more like my newborn.  And yet - I try and try and TRY to remember that her world isn't easy either.  I try to look at things from her point of view.  I reason with her best I can.  I explain.  I give her chances to make good choices and all that jazz.  We do all right.  But sometimes?  Sometimes you just can't wait for Friday.

3 comments:

Bobbi Sharp said...

:)

So the line is Al & Ray; my sis found the dresses at Goody's (Stage Stores) and apparently Kohl's also carries the line.

jennybee said...

You get a mommy gold star for that day.

I wonder if blackout curtains would help in Abby's room? Room darker longer = Abby sleeps longer?

Anonymous said...

You are a gold star Mom. I'm hoping that this Thursday is a rarity. Maybe blackout curtains might help.

Granny

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